It’s become normal for children to move back in with their parents after college.

It’s comforting for both the adult child AND the parent.

But is it really in the best interest of your adult child?

We all want our children to be happy in life.

“Happy” is subjective and can include being grateful, satisfied, and financially responsible.

For your adult child to be all of these things, how do you prepare them to leave the nest and begin on their adult journey of life?

One way to begin is to help them start thinking about how they envision their adult lifestyle.

Ask questions such as the following:

Do they want to travel around the world?

Do they want to start their own company?

Do they want to own a home?

Do they want a large family?

These questions will help them think beyond purchasing the latest fashion trend or computer game.

When they begin seeing themselves as adults, they’ll be ready to start becoming financially responsible.

Some things for you to consider:

1- Hire a CFP® to help them create a budget. While you can help them, it may be better received from a third party.

2- Stop paying for their living expenses. Start charging rent and their share of utilities and food. In this way, they begin learning to live with less discretionary money.

3- Stop bailing them out if they can’t pay their bills. It’s difficult to become independent when you can’t manage your money. If you’re constantly bailing them out of their overspending, how will they ever learn?

While these steps may be challenging to implement, it’ll help them grow into a financially responsible adult.

Recognize any type of change in a relationship is difficult. You will still be the parent, but your role will be different as your child continues their journey into adulthood.

(Update to original post from December 12, 2017)


Niv Persaud, CFP®, CDFA®, RICP®, is a Managing Director at Transition Planning & Guidance, LLC. Life is more than money. It’s about living the lifestyle you want and can afford. For that reason, Niv consults with clients on money, life, and work. Her approach capitalizes on techniques she learned throughout her career, including as a management consultant, executive recruiter, and financial advisor. Her services include developing  comprehensive financial plans, divorce financial reviews, and retirement plans. Niv actively gives back to her community through her volunteer efforts. She believes in living life to the fullest by cherishing friendships, enjoying the beauty of nature and laughing often — even at herself. Her favorite quote is by Erma Bombeck, “When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left and could say ‘I used everything you gave me.’”