With technology, it seems one needs to be available for work 24/7, especially in a demanding career.
With these demands, it can feel overwhelming when you also strive to be an active parent.
There’s always discussion about balancing work and life. But in reality, there are no clear boundaries from work.
Instead, we need to learn to integrate work into our lives.
It’s also beneficial to redefine our expectations of being an active parent.
Ditch the expectation that it’s about having endless hours with your kids.
Replace it with setting priorities and making moments that truly count.
Share something about your work with your kids so they know what you do.
It doesn’t have to be complicated, but just enough so they know what you do pays for the house, food, and activities.
Also, have them describe your work using their own words. In this way, it confirms their understanding.
Use technology to leverage your parenting when you’re out of town or stuck in the office working on a project.
Just like your colleagues and clients communicate with you using technology, you can do the same with your kids.
If you work from home, use visual cues to communicate clearly that you need to focus on work.
Have your kids help you make a “do not disturb” sign while you explain why they need to respect your work time.
Also, figure out a way to let them know when you’ll be available.
Use a clock or the start time of a show to let them know when you’re available.
Find something you can do consistently with your kids. It doesn’t have to be elaborate.
For example, ask them for their peak and valley at bedtime. This ritual can also be implemented when you travel for work.
If their bedtime is during a business dinner, excuse yourself for a few minutes to keep the ritual.
Let your kids know it needs to be a shorter conversation – it’ll help them learn how to adapt.
Another idea is to let them help you make dinner.
They may not have the skills of a sous chef, but they can bring you items from the pantry or refrigerator.
If that’s too stressful, let them help you set the table.
The key is to have the opportunity for open-ended conversations.
Being an active parent with a demanding career can be challenging.
Time with your kids may be consumed with telling them what to do, buying last-minute supplies for a project due the next day, or even taxiing them from one activity to another.
But find time during these daily activities for consistent open-ended conversations. Those are the moments they’ll remember because you were present and listening to them.
And give yourself grace during those days when you’re stretched.
No one is perfect, and your kids don’t expect you to be … unless they’re a teenage girl.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Niv Persaud, CFP®, CDFA®, RICP®, is a Managing Director at Transition Planning & Guidance, LLC. Life is more than money. It’s about living the lifestyle you want and can afford. For that reason, Niv consults with clients on money, life, and work. Her approach capitalizes on techniques she learned throughout her career, including as a management consultant, executive recruiter, and financial advisor. Her services include developing comprehensive financial plans, divorce financial reviews, and retirement plans. Niv actively gives back to her community through her volunteer efforts. She believes in living life to the fullest by cherishing friendships, enjoying the beauty of nature and laughing often — even at herself. Her favorite quote is by Erma Bombeck, “When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left and could say ‘I used everything you gave me.’”