It’s interesting how life comes full circle.
When we were younger, our mothers took care of us.
In many of those instances, we don’t remember exactly what she did. But we do know she gave birth to us, she fed us, she took us to our activities, she dressed us, and many more things.
Now, as she’s aging, it’s our turn to take care of our mothers. The burden is felt more if she is widowed or single.
When you’re the caregiver to a parent, you may be going non-stop because of responsibilities as a spouse, parent, business owner/employee.
There’s just not enough time in the day.
But know, this caregiving role is temporary. There will be a day when your mother is no longer alive.
When that reality sets in, it may be easier to shift priorities and reframe your attitude.
Spend quality time:
Every moment spent with your mother is an opportunity to create new memories and learn more about her experiences.
Find time during the week to just sit and talk with your mother over a cup of coffee or tea.
If she’s mobile, go for a short walk.
Seek help:
Ask your kids or your spouse to help you care for your mother.
If they’re unable to lighten the load, reach out to other family members, friends, and support groups.
You may just need to talk with someone who understands the demands of caregiving.
Practice patience:
Aging can change your mother’s mood, memory, and independence.
She may be struggling with these changes and doesn’t know how to express them.
Extending patience and empathy will help you both navigate these changes.
Caring for aging mothers is a journey that taps our emotions and challenges our schedule.
The hard part is that she may be difficult due to her personality. Or she may still be struggling with widowhood.
We really don’t know until we pause and listen.
Know this role is temporary and embrace the precious time you have with her.
ABOUT THE AUTHOR:
Niv Persaud, CFP®, CDFA®, RICP®, is a Managing Director at Transition Planning & Guidance, LLC. Life is more than money. It’s about living the lifestyle you want and can afford. For that reason, Niv consults with clients on money, life, and work. Her approach capitalizes on techniques she learned throughout her career, including as a management consultant, executive recruiter, and financial advisor. Her services include developing comprehensive financial plans, divorce financial reviews, and retirement plans. Niv actively gives back to her community through her volunteer efforts. She believes in living life to the fullest by cherishing friendships, enjoying the beauty of nature and laughing often — even at herself. Her favorite quote is by Erma Bombeck, “When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left and could say ‘I used everything you gave me.’”